Small Steps Versus Canyons

A common theme I've been noticing in my thoughts has to do with small steps versus canyons. To explain the metaphor: I am told by many that you need to take small steps to see growth, improvement and change. I'm told this with the health care bill. I'm told this at work. I'm told this by almost every rational person I know.

But I'm not rational, I'm a Romantic.

Contrasting this is a phrase I learned about a year ago: "You can't take small steps across a canyon." I heard this phrase at a "Designing for Bicycles" workshop. Sometimes, the best thing to do when re-designing, and re-thinking something is to break with the past and start completely fresh.

This appeals to my sense of the Romantic, but I fear jumping across a canyon and landing someplace where I don't want to be. So when is "canyon hopping" appropriate? When should I accept small changes that don't do enough?

Random things about myself

So this fad to list "25 random things" has been going on for a while. The other day, I took the time to actually read some of them and found them really enjoyable. So to reciprocate, below are some very personal statements about myself. Please do take the time to read and enjoy them.

1. I feel blessed that so many friends have tagged me in notes, and blessed in general to have the friends I do. I appreciate you all thinking of me, even if it's just for a brief moment.
2. I am consciously trying to incorporate the words "bless" and "pray" into my life. I always hated these words because of the right-wing, but they are beautiful words and I intend to reclaim them.
3. I am working on being more creative. This is having the amusing side effect of making me more vocal with my opinions.
4. I confess that I am addicted to reading. I stopped for one week and had serious withdraw.
5. I care about, and am good at, too many things. While I am loathe to complain about it (I don't want to appear arrogant or unappreciative), it makes it really difficult for me to figure out what I want to do and where I want to go. For example, right now I'm debating between being a lawyer, a farmer, or an acupuncturist. Sigh.
6. I get really stressed when people try to demean my (gay) marriage. But at the same time, I think about the enormous strides that have been made with regard to gay rights, and realize that my stresses pale in comparison. I will proudly continue to inform and educate people.
7. I have always avoided being trendy at all costs. Ironically, this makes me just as beholden to trends. I realized this as a teen, and have since been trying to shake myself of this.
8. I have met great people in my fraternity and love many of them. At the same time, I find myself questioning the relevancy of such organizations in this day and age.
9. I have always considered myself an introvert and been proud of this fact. However, I have to acknowledge that life has turned me into an extrovert...!
10. The glass is not half empty. It's not even half full. It's completely full. Half with air, half with water.
11. I think that punning shows a love (and mastery) of language. It is a lost and unappreciated art form this day and age.
12. I am very aware of sentences ending in prepositions and misuse of adverbs. However, I also recognize that English is a living language and is allowed to evolve. (BUT NOT WITH THE WORD CHILLAX, WALLESKA!!!)
13. I love to travel, yet I love to be at home. I may never reconcile this.
14. I feel that Seattle is the most amazing place ever. I love it so much. It feels like heaven. But I also know that my life is here (on the east coast), and therefore cannot live in heaven during this life. It feels strangely appropriate.
15. I am deeply spiritual, traditional, and enjoy hierarchy. To this end, I worry that if I wasn't gay, I would have become a right-wing nut in the military.
16. Two driving emotions in my life have been avoiding shame, and avoiding disappointing others. I'm trying to acknowledge this, and let go of it.
17. I never had a father figure growing up. I long for one, but also realize that I am too much my own person at this point to ever allow someone to fill that role for me.
18. I believe that we are in a huge paradigm shift for our species. Peak Oil. Economic contraction (not just a recession or a depression, but contraction). Food insecurity. Community breakdowns. Lack of personal responsibility. I fear and hope for the future.
19. I have never smoked or done drugs, though I do enjoy a drink or two.
20. I am so much in love with my husband. I can see us old, gray and wrinkled together.
21. I am very aware of time. If I ever had a superpower, I would want the ability to manipulate time. Not travel through time, mind you! ... just the ability to create localized distortions in the flow of time. (ie, plant a seed and make it grow into a tree in an instant)
22. I have grown food in my backyard for two years now and love it. I want more land so I can have a mini-cow and chickens.
23. I think in systems. I always look at how connected / interconnected things are. I am hyper aware of how my personal choices can sustain many unsustainable systems and try to make my choices responsibly (buying local food, supporting independent businesses, etc). (See 18)
24. I adopt the persona of a wacky, harmless jokester. I feel this allows me to bring up things in a non-threatening half-joking manner. At the same time, I feel it hinders me from being taken very seriously.
25. There is a world I've been creating in my head since I was in high school. I call it Path. It has cities, cultures, wars, histories, magic and gods. I've used this world as a setting in a few roleplaying games, and am now attempting to do some writing about this world.
26. I can see both sides of every argument and sometimes debunk my own points in an argument. Ironically, instead of making me wishy-washy, I feel it has given me very strong convictions. I make informed choices based on equal examination from both sides. I also believe I am a very good teacher / communicator because of this.

Well, I would up with 26. I hope you learned and / or understand some things about me a little better. Thanks for reading this, and I hope you are all well.

Pizza frite

I wrote in an earlier entry about my love of pizza frite and how important it is to me. Well, I had my husband take some photos of my brother and me making pizza frite this past Christmas and I thought I would share them. Enjoy my photo tour of one of my most personal food experiences.

You start out with some pizza dough. Make it yourself, or buy some from the store. Stretch it out and then cut it up into crazy pieces.

Be sure to make lots of cuts and holes! My brother and I like to find images in the frite (kind of like looking at clouds). Every year we seem to make at least one Christmas tree, one crab and a bunch of fishbones. I wonder what that says about the two of us.

Fry up the dough pieces in a skillet of oil. Flip them over with tongs and brown both sides. When you take them out, we always cool the frite on some paper towels to help absorb the oil.

And voila! Pizza frite! We spread the Christmas brunch table with all sorts of sweet condiments for the pizza frite: jams, maple syrup, honey and powered sugar. But my personal favorite is sugar with some salt mixed in. Or if I'm feeling adventurous, just the salt alone. What can I say? I'm a savory guy.

Let me leave you all with one last picture. In order to pump these guys out you need a conveyor belt of activities, with one person as cutter and one as fryer. Here you can see the teamwork in action!

Christmas Traditions

I love Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. There are some traditions that my family would do every year and some we would switch out. In either event, there is a rhythm to those days which remain little changed from my childhood.

Christmas Eve
Sometimes my family would go out for dinner on Christmas Eve. This was always at some nice fancy place, kind of a quiet evening with my family. Those were special, but the real fun happened when we could have Christmas Dinner at Aunt A's house. She would have meatballs, lasagna, breaded clams, calamari, pizzelle, struffoli... The works. This wasn't just for my small nuclear family, but for the larger Italian side of my family. And that is a lot of people. On my father's branch along, I've got seven brothers and sisters. I'm an uncle 15 times over. I am also a great-uncle twice over! And likely my Aunt A's branch is probably even larger. Granted, most of my father's branch doesn't show up, but I think I am conveying the point.

Sometimes that night, we could go to midnight mass. Growing up we would go to the Dutch Reformed Church down the street. As my one brother and I got older, we stopped going. None of us were particularly religions. Just spending time together at home had more meaning for us. We would relax, unwind and have some eggnog. Now as a teenager, I tried implementing this "open one present on Christmas Eve night" tradition. Alas, that one did not stick!

Christmas Day
Obviously, as a child, this was dominated by presents. However, this was soon replaced by Christmas Breakfast. One traditional food that we would make every year was "pizza friet" which, as I understand it, means "fried pizza dough" in Italian. My brother and I would form a pizza friet team. One would cut the dough into interesting shapes, the other would watch the fry pan, flipping and taking out the friet as necessary. My mom would make this really interesting egg and cheese souffle, and sometimes we'd have this cinnamon balls baked together in a bundt pan. All this food definitely became more important than presents.

After we had a huge brunch, we'd then saunter over to the living room and tree. Hudson, my brother's dog was actually the most excited about presents. This dog knows which presents are his (by the scent) and can actually unwrap most presents. It's an amazing thing to watch. One person would be "Santa" and dole out the presents, and we'd make sure everyone got equal shares. As our family grew (with spouses) this part of the day would take up more and more time. We've since agreed to a reduced present load, but somehow we all violate it and go over.

After unwraping presents we'd usually all retreat to our own spaces and rummage through our new hoard of goodies. The afternoon would pass with us relaxing and having some down time.

Christmas dinner was on of two things. When I was smaller, we'd have a ham or turkey for dinner that my mom spent the afternoon cooking. But as I got older, my friends' parents would have my family over for Christmas dinner. These parents, by the way, owned a award-winner, internationally acclaimed pastry shop. So yeah, good food and all my friends were there with all our parents. My friends and I would compare note about presents and hang out. It was good times.


Two days of traditions and non-stop awesomeness with friends and family. That is why I love Christmas time.

Growing Up

I think I'm growing up. I am not longer quite as excited to visit my mom's house for Christmas. Now, let me preface this a bit. I grew up without my biological father. Family, and family traditions are of extreme importance to be because I was keenly aware of how delicate family life can sometimes be. To this end, I always looked forward to the two weeks around Christmas. My mother is a teacher and she would have those weeks off. My brother would either return from college, or have those weeks off (he's got an awesome boss). The three of us would all be together. It was so special for me. The friends I grew up with would be around. I felt known. I felt understood. I felt like I was surrounded by family.

Now, I have my own house. I am married and have my own family. Granted we don't have kids yet, but hopefully someday. We do have our needy cat though. It's a hassle to leave our house and find someone to water the plants and watch the cat. We have our own tree and our own holiday decorations. My brother has a wife now too. They have their own tree. My mom has even remarried.

So times has changed and I feel like I'm grasping at this romantic notion of my past. I still love my family and I still feel close with them. I can't imagine spending Christmas somewhere else. But I no longer hang around for two weeks. One week is the most I manage now and often times that seems like more than enough.